Sometimes I'm confused how people make decisions about offering a calling in my church. Like when my sister, a stay-at-home mom of 6 children all under the age of 7 years old, was called to nursery (caring for a roomful 18 month old to 3 year old kids). I can imagine her bishop at the time saying to himself "Who should I call to take care of all those kids for 2 hours on Sunday? Hmmm.... I know! How about Lisa! She has lots of young kids, she must love them!" Not considering that perhaps she'd like a little time away from hordes of tiny people for at least two hours on Sundays.
A similar conversation may have happened last week as some people were trying to decide who should be the single adult rep in my current ward. They might have said, "Who could we get to track the 10-15 singles in our ward, help plan activities, and attend them? Hmmm... I know! How about we choose the single mom in the ward who homeschools, is working on a PhD, and has a full-time job! She already has a calling, but I'm sure she can fit one more thing in her schedule!"
It doesn't make any sense. But here I am: the single adult rep in my ward. My hat rack is getting pretty full.... :)
In all honesty, I'm really not upset or bitter about the new hat. In fact, I think I'll like wearing it once in a while. I still don't feel like I have a place in my ward, so this is one way for me to be "forced" to meet new people and try to form a comraderie with them. And most of the time it will just mean that I miss my Sunday nap. (Which could have tragic results if it was every week, but once a month probably won't affect my sanity overly much.) Of course, I'll also have to go to more single adult activities, which proved to be problematic when I went to one this summer (I had a 50-something year old man pursue me for about a month before he got the hint that I don't want to date someone who could be my father.) But I'll just have to learn to be a little meaner to men who don't understand age differences.
I went to my first meeting today with the other ward singles reps. Even though they are all single themselves, I couldn't help but feel we oscillated between patronizing and bleeding hearts-- like we are the only hope for this group of wandering souls, disconnected from social bonds, waiting and wishing for someone, anyone, to make them feel loved. It was a bit grating. But of course, I'm probably being overly sensitive and hard on them. I know they mean well. But I also know that we "singles" aren't just a bunch of wandering souls who need church activities specially designed to fill our lives with joy and meaning.
Despite my, um, cheeriness in this post, I actually am glad for this calling. I think it will be good for me and hopefully I can help a few people feel like they are part of some group who notices them and cares.
Well, I wanted to write more about my schedule and what we've been up to lately-- but it's bedtime. Probably it's for the best that I don't write tonight anyway-- I'm feeling a bit sassy (obviously) and should limit the amount of sassiness I inflict on others.
Have a great week and perhaps I'll be back on next Sunday with some more joy and cheer. :)
If we did all the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves.
Thomas A. Edison
6 comments:
I love when you are sassy! I think you will probably come to even like your new calling. Just try to keep those other bleeding hearts at bay. They need you, I think!
Ha ha!! Yes, Lane...those years with my own "Nursery" and then being not only the Ward Nursery Leader, but at the same time was also the Stake Nursery Leader...Yes...(it was Moab)were some of the most stress-filled times of my life...but somehow I lived through them and became better...you know the saying, "Father in heaven only gives us those trials and 'opportunities' He knows we can handle" :) So I have full confidence that this calling for you is inspired and you will grow immensely from it and maybe not so much yourself will be served or helped...but I'm confident that there are some brothers and sisters you and only YOU can reach and touch as you serve them and lead them...I believe this!
You're an AMAZING WOMAN!!! I'M SOOOOOOOOOO blessed to have you as my sister! Lisa oxxoxox
PS And did you know that my 'coveted' calling has finally come to me...I'm a Nursery leader now with Kenny! ha ha I love it!!! And now we are old and no small kids around, we are really having fun with it! :)
PPS Thanks for the recipe on the apple soup...I'm going to try it!
Laney, single people are hopeless and have no social mobility or ability. They live in dark boxes and have no skills or desire to communicate with other human beings. They are generally good with cats and certain breeds of dogs. You should realize that not only are you the ONLY hope for this group of single Vietnam prisoners, you will have to teach them to talk and chew properly. LOL. I have a lot of humor for you in this. My mom was widowed pretty early on in my childhood and they put her in charge of the 'widows party' every year. Not only did she have to find all the 'widows' and plan it, she also had FIND A BABYSITTER and be escorted by a member of the bishop brick (wow how do you spell bishop brick?). Once there, she was the only person under 70. My heart bleeds for you but as always you get to have lots of funny stories and awkward social moments that make watching the Office (if you have seen TV in the last 5 years your poor thing) even funnier. Love you, best of luck!
Hey Laney, nice to hear life is keeping you busy and out of trouble ;-) I must admit I got a chuckle reading you were pursued by a 50-something guy. You had a similar experience while you lived in Bloomington, no?
Well, anyway, take care of yourself and tell Joseph and Emiline hello for me!
-Eric
Ya know - I feel that way almost every time I see someone get a calling in Church. It's usually - "well duh - they're perfect for that calling." or "umm - hello ... they're totally the wrong person for that calling" or "wow - I can't believe they gave that calling to them with all they've got going on ..."
But then I remember what it's like for most of the leaders issuing those calls ... it usually comes after a ton of thought and prayer, and for me, always an incredibly poignant revelation I cannot deny.
Because of our Church culture, we sometimes forget that in our lay ministry, our callings still come from the Lord, and He knows better than anyone what we need, and more often, who needs us.
I think your feelings are totally on the spot. I know that you're an amazing woman w/ the capacity to touch the lives of so many people - so obviously you need as many responsibilities, callings, activities and whatnot as possible right? :-)
You go girl - you rock my world.
When I don't like a calling we move LOL! We moved every year in Logan...and it wasn't always callings, but when we moved I would just thank my lucky stars sometimes just to get out of a calling...is that bad?? haha
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